My favoritest thing

My very favorite thing in the whole world, I have come to discover, is old people in bars. They have been thru shit, they have seen it all and at the bar, they are pretty damn funny. Indulge yourself sometime, usually you find them on a Saturday afternoon at a beatup rundown bar. Just go and listen, you won't be disappointed. Here's a few gems that I got from various old folks at a bar, just like getting hammered with your granddad or grandma:

"you know, in Arkansas, that's the only place with a big sign over the door of the justice of the peace saying, even though you're divorced, you're still brother and sister."

"48 years ago, this girl sat crying at the edge of my bed, oh it's too big, it's too big...and i cried at the edge of my bed, it's too big, it's too big."

"This lady I knew who became born again had one of those damned 'my boss is a jewish carpenter' stickers on her car and let everyone know she was all born again.....I saw her at a Wal-Mart parking lot and her car had quit, she couldn't get it to start......I walked by and remarked, "Bet you wish your boss was a mechanic, huh?" she didn't talk to me again for a long time!!"

I love them, I love old people in bars.....they make life worth living! Cuz you know, it's not all bad.....Life is pretty funny if you just look.

Eminem had too many M&Ms

from gossip boulevard:

Rap star Eminem has been offered a deal to become a spokesman for diet plan Slim-Fast. The hip hop legend has famously ballooned in weight to over 200lbs after stepping out of the spotlight, even recently landing in hospital because of a heart problem. Now Slim-Fast wants to help him once again become the Real Slim Shady by taken on its diet plan.

The deal would be for Eminem to be a spokesman for the firm by showing the world how it helped him drop the pounds. “Slim-Fast is a program that can really work for someone like Eminem,” a spokesman for Slim-Fast said. “It’s a doable and flexible approach. Slim-fast would love to offer Eminem product and assistance to help him become a potential S-F success story.”

Slim-Fast aims to help people like Eminem lose a steady one to two pounds of weight a week by eating about 1,900 calories a day. The plan also recommends 30 minutes or more of moderate physical activity most days of the week.

The rapper’s estranged mother Debbie Nelson has admitted that her son has ballooned in weight. She said: “His face has broken out in pimples and he’s put on so much weight that he’s causing all sorts of other health problems for himself.”

This really scares me....

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Double Date with the Seinfelds

WEDNESDAY JANUARY 16, 2008 12:30 PM EST
Jerry Seinfeld (left) dined with Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise Photo by: Ahmad Elatab / Jackson Lee / Splashnewsonline; INFphoto Suri may not have joined them, but Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had plenty of company at New York City's Sfoglia Tuesday night.

The pair joined Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld at the exclusive upper east side eatery, for a nearly three-hour-long meal. Along with plates of rustic Italian food and red wine, the foursome shared plenty of laughs.

In addition to Holmes entertaining the table with her animated storytelling, Cruise and Seinfeld cracked a few jokes.

The Seinfelds left the restaurant first, leaving Cruise and Holmes to collect themselves before hitting the onslaught of paparazzi waiting outside.

and don't forget this:

Jerry Seinfeld has insisted that his belief in Scientology made him a better comedian in his early career.

The Seinfeld star said he was introduced to the religion by a high school teacher almost 30 years ago.

He told Parade magazine: "It was interesting. Believe it or not... it's extremely intellectual and clinical in its approach to problem-solving, which really appealed to me."

Although he did not become as heavily involved as celebrity followers Tom Cruise and John Travolta, he added that his faith had improved his skills as a comic, saying: "In my early years of stand-up, it was very helpful. I took a couple of courses. One of them was in communication, and I learned some things about communication that really got my act going.

"They [Scientologists] have a lot of very good technology. That's what really appealed to me about it. It's not faith-based. It's all technology. And I'm obsessed with technology."

*off of gossip rocks*

I call Bullshit

Britney is aware and knows what she is playing....unless she's drugged up. I don't buy the multiple personality thing. from TMZ:

Sources are now painting a very disturbing picture of Britney Spears, or whoever she happens to be at any given moment.

We're told the whole British accent thing -- well, it's more than an accent. Britney has multiple personalities, including, as people in her life call it, "the British girl." We're told when Spears loses the British personality, she has absolutely no idea what she did during the time she assumed that personality.

Sources say Brit has a number of other identities, where she becomes "the weepy girl, the diva, the incoherent girl," and on and on.

Sources say Britney had become the British girl the day she didn't show for her deposition and has no recollection of it.

If you havn't seen this....

I think Gawker is the only one left standing showing the crazy Tom Cruise $cientology video, you can catch it here....it is scary, it is funny....C of $ seems to have all the answers, ppl! Don't look anywhere else, they know everything! Sound familiar? Ring of anything else cultish where only one group has all the answers? I'll let you mull that over.

http://gawker.com/5002269/the-cruise-indoctrination-video-scientology-tried-to-suppress

cuz I wish the world was a different place too, and that I could go on vacation....you just have to see this. CRAZY!!!! Spread the word, ppl need to know about the crazy!!!

Here's the deal....you can't see it thru Internet Explorer with this link...but you can still watch it thru Firefox.

You can also view thru Firefox here:

www.welcometoholleywood.blogspot.com

watch while you can! who knows how long til it all gets pulled down! I'm going to do my best to download a copy!

Peace Offering....

Sorry for the lack of posts....since I've been pooping for the past 2 days...but as a special treat, here's Beck with Where it's at......before we knew about the crazy C of $ thing.....

Beck - Where It's At
Uploaded by hushhush112

OMG

Green tea......it makes you poop.


A LOT. That is all.

oh, WTF

This girl just gives me headaches anymore....off of hollywood.tv:

BRITNEY SPEARS is reportedly planning to marry paparazzo boyfriend ADNAN GHALIB - in a desperate bid to win back custody of her children.The concerned family of the already twice-wed singer have approached lawyers about the "very likely" possibility of a wedding - because the 26-year-old's recent erratic behaviour, including a sudden trip to Mexico on Wednesday (08Jan08), has raised fears over whether the star will elope.

A source says, "Lawyers are now on red alert in case she does get married. Britney is very unpredictable at the moment. But the feeling is that a wedding is very likely. "Her family have discussed with lawyers what could be done if she does suddenly fly away and tie the know. They are preparing to argue that she is not in a sound state of mind - that she is strung out on so many prescription drugs that she does not know what she is doing. "The trip to Mexico had everybody running scared that she had disappeared to get hitched. For a few hours nobody knew where she was. She had disappeared. And that never ever happens."

Spears further fuelled reports of marriage to the British snapper on Friday (11Jan08) when she browsed cars at a Mercedes-Benz dealership with Ghalib wearing a lacy white wedding gown - the same dress she wore to her reception when she wed her second husband Kevin Federline in September 2004. Their divorce was finalised in July 2007. Spears had visitation rights to sons Sean Preston, two, and Jayden James, one, withdrawn after sparking a three-hour stand off with emergency services when she refused to hand them over to Federline following a supervised visit last week (03Jan08). She must attend a court hearing in Los Angeles on Monday (14Jan08) in order to determine whether she is eligible to win back custody of her kids.

They all do share body fluids, don't they?

It wasn't that long ago that Paris n Adrian were running around together, now he's doin Blohan!! That just grosses me out....From Janet Charlton:

Lindsay Lohan has met her match- when it comes to cheating lovers. She has added Entourage star Adrian Grenier to her long list of beaus, both Italian and otherwise, but little does she know HE'S been cheating with an acquaintance of hers - Kim Kardashian! Kim spent time in Cabo with Adrian in early December and they've been in touch and seeing each other on the sly ever since. Maybe that's why Kim was quick to deny that she and footballer Reggie Bush are engaged.